


Crackhead & Co.

by YinYangZodiac



Category: unOrdinary (Webcomic)
Genre: All The Ships, Arlo likes his memes, Blyke and John are bffs, Blyke is baby, Blyke is chaotic, Chaos, Chatting & Messaging, Crackhead energy, Crazy, Funny, Guess who I ship, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Isen doesn't deserve this, John enables him, John is Nice, John is carefree, No Plot/Plotless, Tags, Tags Are Hard, Ugh, Why are there no tags for this fandom, You're Welcome, before joker, but soon they will main, i just wanted John and Blyke to be friends, i ship them all, idk honestly, jk, multishipping is my hobby, or does he?, the girls are along for the ride, they vibe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:53:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27890098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YinYangZodiac/pseuds/YinYangZodiac
Summary: Just the mains being besties.I wanted some relief from all the angst. So have some chaos.
Relationships: Arlo & Blyke (unOrdinary), Arlo & Elaine (unOrdinary), Arlo & John Doe (unOrdinary), Arlo & Remi (unOrdinary), Arlo & Seraphina (unOrdinary), Blyke & Isen & Remi (unOrdinary), Blyke & Isen (unOrdinary), Blyke & John Doe (unOrdinary), Blyke & Remi (unOrdinary), Blyke & Seraphina (unOrdinary), Elaine & Remi (unOrdinary), Isen & Remi (unOrdinary), Isen & Seraphina (unOrdinary), John Doe & Seraphina (unOrdinary), Remi & Seraphina (unOrdinary)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44





	1. Wiccan and Satanism

**Author's Note:**

> Blyke is my favorite character. And what he says about the Satanists is something I have said. Anywho~
> 
> Sidenote: I am, in no way, trying to make fun of any religion in a negative way. I respect your religious beliefs. This is all lighthearted.

**_Fuk Bitxhes Get M$ney_ **  
_Thursday_  
_2:04 AM_

Remi: I feel like Wiccan is my kinda vibe, yknow?

Elaine: No

Arlo: Why?

Sera: can relate

John: omfg let me ALEEP

Isen: aleep

John: ...

John: i fuvking hate you

Isen: I fuvking love u 2 babe

John: gross

Blyke: wiccan is cool, hut i feel like im too chaotic for that

Elaine: What do you mean?

Arlo: Why?

Isen: ??

Blyke: like

Blyke: i feel like satanists would try to recruit me at this point

Blyke: bit what they dont know is that i hate satan just ad much as i hate god

John: HHh-

Remi: Blyke NO

Blyke: ill bevome theonly person who can talk to him, just so i can call him a bitch

Blyke: same wit god

Sera: im fucking crying???

Isen: Blyke are you okay??

John: shut up, he's having a prophecy

Blyke: qhatre they gonna do? Kill me?

Blyke: where wikl they send me? Ill live forecer. Karma is my bestfriend, si they lovr me and will help me

Arlo: He's officially lost it

Remi: Blyke, go to sleep

Blyke: nsh, gotta go fighy god and satsn at thr same time

Johm: HE JUST FUCKING JUMPED OUT THE WINDOW??

Isen: IM ON MY WAY HOLS ON

Remi: ILL GO GET DOC

Elaine: He's dead isn't he?

Sera: Yup

Arlo: Yeah

_John has sent a video._

Elaine: OH MY GOD

Arlo: ...

Arlo: His leg is bent backwards

Sera: damn, he actually cant die

~~~

_11:13 AM_

Remi: So Blyke had a high grade fever last night

Isen: caused by sleep deprivation!

Remi: So he was sick and sleep deprived. Doc is keeping him in the infirmary, knocked out

John: how long us he ginna be out?

Remi: Doc wants to keep him asleep for the rest of today. And us going to provide sleepung meds. Since Blyke has literally been suffering from insomnia for a week

Arlo: That idiot

John: Isen, if you want to stay in Blyke and I's dorm for a while to make sure Blyke takes the sleeping meds, its cool

Isen: oh, thanks! That would really help

John: np

Sera: ok but his leg????

Arlo: It was bent backwards

Elaine: It was traumatizing to see.

Remiz: Doc fixed it. But he said Blyke might have some pain for a while. So no turf wars, and he and Isen can't fight

Isen: serves him right for jumping out a FUVKING WINDOW

John: but he didnt die

John: his prophecy is true

Sera: why did you two not get along again?

John: i dunno

John: but im taking him for boba when hes allowed to leave the infirmsry

Arlo: Why??

John: I like his chaos

John: duh

Sera: you can carry him if he fwts too tired

John: yeah

Isen: what?

Sera: John is jacked

Blyke: can comfirm

Isen: HOW ARE YOU AWAKE??

Remi: GO BACK TO SLEEP!

Blyke: relaxxx

Blyke: Doc got me up so i can eat lunvh

John: can I stop by to see you? Ill bring cake

Blyke: doc says sure, aslong as you dont stay to long

John: bet, omw

Elaine: He's sharing his cake 0.o

Sera: wtf

Arlo: This is going to be a disaster, isn't it?

Isen: Im sxared

Remi: John is just being nice!

Elaine: Two days

Remi: ???

Sera: until Blyke and John cayse trouble together

Arlo: I say a day, max

Isen: two minutes

Remi: They won't

John: I busted Blyke out of the infirmary

Sera: Damn, Isen won

_Blyke has sent a video._

Elaine: DON'T YOU DARE HVYCUCH

Remi: ELAINE???

Isen: John and Blyke just crashed into Elaine, and a wall

_Arlo has sent a video._

Sera: lmao, Doc is gonna kill you both

Remi: ELAINE ARE YOU OKAY???

Elaine: I'm fine

Elaine: >.>

Elaine: Blyke and John are dead to me

Sera: thats fsir

Isen: fsir

Sera: ill kill you

Isen: sorry ma'am

Remi: Doc just strapped John and Blyke down into beds

Arlo: Thank you, Doc

Elaine: Good

Isen: rip

Sera: couldnt agree more

Remi: Hopefully the rest of today will go peacefully


	2. Maybe It's A Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isen gets a taste of his own medicine. Repetitively.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is straight up chaos. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did while writing it.

**_Fuk Bitxhes Get M$ney_ **  
_Friday_  
_12:07 AM_

Sera: how's babysitting goinh? @John @Isen 

Isen: good, Blyke is aaleep

John: aaleep

John: and thks is boring. I want Blyke to be awake

Isen: big baby

Isen: Blyke will be awaje timoerpw

John: '_'

Sera: wow

Remi: I'm glad that Blyke is resting

Arlo: I can't believe he jimped out a window

Isen: jimped

John: heh

Arlo: I'm not afraid to hurt you, Osen

Isen: whos Osen?

Arlo: ...

Arlo: 5

Arlo: 4

Isen: 0.o

John: he just bolted

Arlo: Which way did he go

John: im no snitch

Arlo: Tell me and I'll buy you and Blyke cake and Boba tomorrow after school

John: he went to the left

Isen: John T^T

John: sorry

Arlo: Thank you

Elaine: Did you really just...

Remi: RAT ISEN OUT FOR CAKE AND BOBA?

John: I DID IT FOR BLYKE

Remi: Ok, that's fair

Sera: :-|

John: :>

Elaine: B/

Isen: :-@ 

Isen: SOMEONE HELP MEEE

Arlo: He's fine

Isen: ARLI TRAPPES ME IN TBE STROGAE ROOM ANS IA GONNA HURT MS 

Arlo: He's fine.

John: Arlo, what are you doing to Isen?

Arlo: He'll live

Sera: good enough fof me

John: same

Remi: :/

Elaine: :|

~~~

_8:09 AM_

Blyke: why do i feel so groggy?

John: sleeping meds

Sera: plus not having slept in days...

Blyke: oh yeah

Blyke: whoops

Isen: :/

Isen: I'm not going to school today

Arlo: You're fine

Isen: MY ASS HURTS TYVM

Remi: WHAT??

Elaine: Uh...

John: 0.o

Blyke: kinky~

Arlo: You should have stayed still like I told you

Isen: T^T

Remi: Why does your butt hurt??

John: }=D

John: yeah, why doed it hurt, Isen?

Isen: ITS NOY LIKE THAT

Sera: no?

Isen: NO

Isen: ARLO WAS WACKING ME WITH A STICK, AND I TRIED TO GET AWAY SO HE HIT MY ASS INSTEAD OG MY BACK

Arlo: I warned him '\\('_')/'

Elaine: I-

Blyke: still kinky

Isen: go back to sleep hoe

Blyke: nah

Blyke: i got a date tonight with two hot daddies

Sera: omfg

Remi: Blyke-

Elaine: Hhh

Arlo: ...

Arlo: Why

John: Blyke

John: never call me thay again

Blyke: sorry daddies

John: ...

Arlo: Hit him for me

John: already did

Blyke: T^T

Isen: BAHAHAHA

Isen: You deserved that

Blyke: i know

Sera: so are you gonna deny the date part?

Arlo: Yes

John: eh

Blyke: no

Arlo: ...

Sera: gay

Arlo: It's not a date.

John: technically, i asked Blyke to get boba with me. Arlo just bribed me so hes coming along

Blyke: i dont hsve to pay foe anything, so im calling it a date '\\('_')/'

Remi: That's fair

Elaine: 0.o

Isen: how did Blyke get TWO hot guys

Elaine: Honestly

Isen: THAT WASNT SUPPOSED TO SEND OMFG

Sera: Isen ia jealous

Isen: NO IM NOT

John: Isen~

Isen: T^T

Isen: keave me alone

Blyke: keave

Isen: ...

Isen: turn around

_Elaine has sent a video._

Sera: damn

Arlo: :^,

Arlo: Maybe it can be a date

Isen: IM NIT JEALOUS

John: we believe you

Blyke: my nose hurts

Remi: ISEN WHY WOULD YOU PUNCH HIM. HE NEEDS TO REST

Blyke: im fine, Remi

Isen: I came for a good time but im honestly feeling so attavked right now

Sera: good

Arlo: Good

Remi: Good

John: hah

Blyke: rip

Isen: T^T

~~~

_4:01 PM_

_Blyke has sent a picture._

Isen: are yiu being crushed?

Blyke: happily

John: why am I by the window?

Arlo: So I can bolt if necessary

Sera: why would you need to?

Arlo: Would'nt you like to know, Weather Boy

Remi: I-

Elaine: You're hanging out with Blyke, John and Isen too much

Arlo: :^,

Isen: koll it with fire

Blyke: koll

Isen: ...

Isen: :-|

Sera: bahahah

Remi: XD

Elaine: F

John: F

Arlo: F

Isen: im never getting informayion for any of you ever again

John: informayion

Isen: ...

_Isen has left the group._


	3. Gingerbread Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kinda gay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never planned to get plot involved, but I think a plot is beginning to creep in.
> 
> Ships? Maybe.

**_Fuk Bitxhes Get M$ney_ **  
_Friday_  
_6:36 PM_

Sera: Issn is sooo mad guys

Arlo: I'll talk to him

Blyke: ill go buy him some cansy

John: Ill come with to get him somwthing too

Remi: Kinda gay

Elaine: @ who?

Sera: all of thrm

Arlo: ...

Arlo: I'm not gay.

Blyke: not arguing in my casw

John: '\\_('^')_/'

John: maybe I am, maybe I'm not

Sera: thats fair

Remi: True

Remi: Anyway, @Sera @Elaine want to come build a gingerbread house with me for Isen?

Elaine: On my way!

Sera: sure, be there soon

Blyke: have fun!

~~~

_9:12 PM_

Blyke: anyone heard from Arlo?

Remi: No? I texted Isen earlier and he left me on seen

John: weird

Sera: im calling Arlo

_Elaine has sent a picture._

Blyke: WOAH

John: HOLY SHIT

Remi: We put so much effort into it

Blyke: IS THAT LITTLE GINGERBREAS MAN ISEN???

Elaine: Yep! Cute right?

John: yes. Isen will love it

_Arlo has added Isen to the chat._

Isen: why is there boxes of candy all over my room?

Blyke: its John amd is apology candy

John: mine is better

Isen: is ir the boxes with your name on them?

John: yes

John: I wanted you to know who bought the better apology candy

Blyke: we literally got him the same candies

John: your point?

Blyke: youre lucky youre pretty

John: (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)ﻭ

Isen: anyway

Isen: I forgive you all

Remi: Yay!

Elaine: (/◕ヮ◕)/

Sera: ok

Sera: what were you and Arlo doing?

Arlo: We were talking.

Sera: you were breathless?

Isen: we went on a run

Blyke: you hate running?

John: Alro asked me what would be a good way to relieve stress

John: I told him any form of exercise is good

Sera: oh

Isen: yeah, Arlo convinced me to go on a run. it helped

Arlo: Glad to help

Elaine: You want to come eat the gingerbread house with us @Isen?

Isen: yeah!

Remi: (/◕ヮ◕)/

~~~

**_Arlo to John_ **  
_9:48 PM_

Arlo: Thanks.

John: of course

John: you know we won't judge you, right?

Arlo: ...

Arlo: I'm still figuring things out

John: I get that

John: but just remember that you aren't alone

Arlo: I know

John: ok ◕‿◕

~~~

**_Fuk Bitxhes Get M$ney_ **  
_Saturday_  
_1:11 AM_

Elaine: SERAPHINA HELP ME PLEASE

Remi: ???

Sera: what happwned??

Elaine: I LIT A CANDLE ANS NOW RHWRWS A FIRE IN OUR ROOM

Sera: coming!!

John: wjat...

Arlo: Should we get a teacher?

Isen: nah

Remi: Sera put it out

Sera: it was small

Elaine: (ಥ﹏ಥ)

John: sigh

John: Blyke wpuld have loved this

Isen: he's not dead. STOP BEING A DRAMA QUEEN

John: (ಥ﹏ಥ)

Arlo: You literally share a dorm with him?

John: he passed out like 3 hours ago. I had ro carry him to his room

Isen: it was oddly cute

John: guys my heart can't take it anymore

John: HE'S TOO ADORABLE

Remi: Ask him out

John: HAH

_John has left the chat._

Sera: too soon

Elaine: Should we delete those messages before Blyke sees them?

Arlo: On it

Isen: John is pacing

Isen: it's making me nervous

Sera: when are you not nervous?

Isen: you got me there

_Remi has added John to the chat._

John: I'm fine

Elaine: Are you?

John: yes

Remi: o.o?

John: (@.@)

Isen: (´-﹏-`；)

Arlo: Please, let me sleep

Remi: Sorry Arlo

Remi: Goodnight everyone!

Elaine: Goodnight!

Sera: night nerds

Isen: B/ night

John: இдஇ

~~~

**_Sera to John_ **  
_1:37 AM_

Sera: you like Blyke?

John: kinda?

Sera: ಠ_ಠ

John: I don't know ok!

John: he's cute and funny? But I barely know him

Sera: I understand

Sera: if you do want to date him in tje future, I.support you

John: (^o^; thank you!

Sera: anytime

John: so...you and Remi?

Sera: ...

Sera: Goodnight.

John: •̀.̫•́✧


	4. "Accident"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kind of all over the place. Oh well.

**_Fuk Bitxhes Get M$ney_ **   
_Saturday_   
_7:43 AM_

Arlo: Oh no.

Sera: ??

Arlo: My aunt is in town.

Remi: (¯―¯٥)

Elaine: (▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿▀̿ ̿)

John: uh...

Blyke: why is sje in town?

Arlo: Something to do with a case. But she's staying with my parents. She's going to ask about my grades and what I've been doing.

Isen: I don't see the problem? You're doing amazing in school!

Arlo: It's not enough for her. She'll tell my parents that I need to do better.

John: how long will she be here?

Arlo: A week?

John: let's start a club

Arlo: What? Why??

John: if you're busy setting up an academically appropriate club, you won't have to go see her. and she'll havw nothing to complain about because ypu'll be doing something academically good. and you'll be the leader of it or whatever

Arlo: That's actually not a bad idea

Remi: We can all help too!

Elaine: Yeah! It will be fun

Isen: (◉ω◉)

Blyke: (◉ω◉)

Arlo: Is it too late to disagree?

John: Yup •̀.̫•́✧

~

_12:07 PM_

John: (≧▽≦)

Remi: I can't believe they approved our club

Elaine: Same (-_-;)

Isen: we're lucky! that was so half-assed

Sera: but we got ir

Blyke: this is gonna bw fun

John: yeah! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)ﻭ

Arlo: (/◕ヮ◕)/

Arlo: I'm going to throw up

Remi: ?? WHY

Arlo: I told my parents about the club and they said my aunt wants to come see it.

John: ...

John: I could just kill her

Isen: seconded

Blyke: i can hide the body

Sera: I can make it look like an accident

Arlo: What? No.

Remi: ...

Arlo: Remi, tell them to stop planning murder

Remi: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Arlo: ...

Arlo: @Elaine stop these idiots

Elaine: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

John: it's settled

John: at night, we march

Arlo: You don't know where my parents live

John: ...

John: @Remi @Isen do you know his address?

Remi: •̀.̫•́✧

Remi: I'll dm you

Arlo: REMI

Remi: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Remi: I don't like your aunt. She insulted my brother

Arlo: How??

Remi: She was, like, one of the people that were trying to accuse Rei of a robbery when he was driving to his college. He almost got expelled because of her

Arlo: I didn't know about that

Remi: Rei didn't want you too

Arlo: Oh

Arlo: So we march at night?

John: (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)ﻭ

Blyke: (◉ω◉)

Isen: I'll bring the snacks!

Remi: (◉ω◉)

~

Arlo: Keenu said because of all the recent violent attacks, that my aunt can't come visit since he isn't letting any visitors in the school

John: •̀.̫•́✧

Blyke: •̀.̫•́✧

Sera: victory!!

Remi: Oh thank God

Elaine: (/◕ヮ◕)/

Isen: want to have a movie night tjen?

Arlo: All of us?

Elaine: Yes! That would be so fun!

John: sure, sounds like fun

Blyke: i cant

Blyke: the meds will make me sleep

Isen: do you have plans tomorrow?

Blyke: no?

Isen: just take the meds later on tonight and ypu can sleep in in the morning

Remi: Oh yeah! Then you can have a movie marathon with us!

Blyke: ok!

John: why would you let them talk you into not takinf your meds but I can't?

Blyke: suddenly i cant read இдஇ

John: oi!!

Isen: •̀.̫•́✧

Remi: •̀.̫•́✧

John: (´-﹏-`；)

Arlo: (¯―¯٥)

Elaine: Well

Sera: the chaos in here is beautiful

John: I feel betrayed ༼ つ ಥ_ಥ ༽つ

Sera: good

John: ಠ_ಠ

John: blocked

Elaine: (¯―¯٥)

Arlo: What are we doing for food?

Isen: I can order pizza

Remi: I'll run to the store to get popcorn and chips!

Elaine: Where are we watching the movies??

Blyke: we can do it in John and I's room

Elaine: Ok! I'll bring pillows and blankets over in a bit!

Blyke: siunds good!

**Author's Note:**

> Any questions, comments or concerns?
> 
> Comment down below  
> DM me on Instagram (@_cryptid.crossing_)  
> DM me or anonymous message me on Tumblr (@cryptid-crossing)


End file.
